My name is Bob, I am 22 years old. I live with my mother Jane and sister Susie, who just turned 18. My father left us when I was 15 and Susie was just 8. Since mom worked a lot of hours to make enough to support the family I often had to watch Susie. I am 6?4? tall like my dad, but Susie was always petite about 5?1? tall and only 98 lbs. even at age 18. I don’t know why but I always teased Susie about being short, saying things like:
- that’s the long and short of it
- what is the difference between a midget and a dwarf, and which one are you?
- can you limbo under the couch and see if the remote fell under there?
- asking her to stand up when she was already standing
- telling her she has pretty eyes, when she was standing on a chair or up a couple of steps, like I’ve never seen them before. Susie never seemed upset when I called her shorty or half pint or any other name you can imagine as a rude thing to say to a short (or vertically challenged) person, but I was about to find out she was keeping score and payback would be a ballbuster.
Today mom came home in a bad mood and seemed to take it out on me, but not on Susie. I was a little annoyed with that and called Susie a midget. Mom hit the roof “You’ve lived here rent free since you graduated high school and I have treated you with a respect that you haven’t really earned, but all you do is mooch and pick on your little (and here I made the mistake of snickering at the little comment) sister. Those days are over mister. Susie go get your ledger.” “What ledger?” I asked. “The ledger mom told me to start about 3 years ago, counting every time you insulted me or picked on me”, Susie said. Now I was getting nervous. I was kidding most of the time but if she wrote down every time it would look bad. “Now if you want to continue to live here, there will be new rules.” Mom said in a stern tone. “Your rude and mean comments to your sister have put you in debt to her and we will even this ledger starting now.” “Mom I was only teasing her, and she acted like she didn’t care, but if she wants to call me dummy, or idiot or
whatever she can go ahead.”
“You are an idiot but you don’t get to decide how she pays you back. SHE DOES!! With my help and guidance.” Just then Susie returned with the ledger actually 3 spiral notebooks, wow was I really that mean? “Susie do you have our running total?” “Yes mom, it’s 8913. Wow what a dick he’s been.” said Susie with a little smile at me, knowing she was getting
some payback of some sort which I was unaware as of yet.
Mom sat down on the couch and told Susie and me to sit as well. “Here is what Susie will get to choose from for a
total payback of eight thousand nine hundred thirteen: she can insult you, which you deserve but I wouldn’t waste them on, or make you do a chore for her, or look taller for 1 minute by forcing you to lay down so she stand on you…” At this point I started to object but was silenced by a slap in the face from Susie. “…as I was saying stand on you for 1 minute, or slap you as you just witnessed but that was to stop you interrupting so it won’t count against Susie, or kick you, or jump on you but that will take off 2 points even though she is very petite, or make you rub her feet for 5 minutes, or clean her shoes with your tongue 1 point for a pair of shoes, or practice her self defense moves for 5 minutes but that will cost 5 points per kick or punch charge and you can’t fight back, oh I forgot punching and kicking 1 point each but because I feel some sympathy kicks to the balls will count 2 points if Susie wears heels or boots, 1 point if her tennies or barefoot. Susie have I forgotten any?”
“Yes mom how many points if I stick my sweaty socks in his mouth?