Have you ever wondered if the character that one displays in public turns out to eat you up over time?

Well, that´s what more or less has been occurring throughout these 5 years. Latching onto diverse perspectives that one could show in public just to end up turning into another mirror of broken glass. I wonder how this board faced such processes of metamorphosis in which said rejuvenated energy would keep it alive while there wasn´t a clear objective for a final landing nor any climax to cherish and contemplate for a long time in which everything stops. I guess that the closest climax that I have considered for such feeling is the end of the year that pretty much matches with the anniversary of this 2nd wave of activity.

Is there anything that one should explain? Basically, I have stopped focusing on how to falsely thrive on this project for my own personal ego. My personal circumstances have made me throw it all away by returning to the same place where I was before embarking on a journey that pretty much reflected my own problems rather than focusing on what one should do and pull off as a proper fan. But I guess...that being the ideal reference to inspire others was pretty much a delusional ego that would never happen. Who would have guessed that said selfish motivation came from a family inheritance (namely one of them)?

I think that endpone deserves better than this and I cannot put all my energies on something that will never escape from being a small backyard. Others should define it better than anything that has been pulled off. As a consequence, I have been focusing on paying attention to my loved ones and saving my own circumstances as well as the ones that come the closest to me. Should this board be considered as part of that? I always lean on the perspective that the people is what make something special, not a place nor a site like this.

That is to say, I have stayed pretty much on retirement because there hasn´t been anything interesting to say and there were much deeper problems to solve that needed my attention. The question remains if there is anything else that one can deliver beyond staying behind the scenes or just sitting on the fence...because standing out as a protagonist in public surely feels tiresome after a while.