https://youtube.com/watch?v=EbY-rSyrkCM [Embed] I struggle to keep up with this girl (Celina not Suzanne) sometimes but she does say a lot of things I find very relatable. She's so sensitive that I don't know how she hasn't exploded into a red mist. It's disappointing how in the end all the intellectual understanding of these things isn't of much use. It doesn't heal your mind or grant you any magical protection, it's just sterile knowledge. You could have the most complete and satisfying theory to explain all these things and you'd still be subject to all the same limitations and harmful behavioral patterns you endured before. I'm not saying that one can't change and mature through experience and introspection, obviously that does happen, but it's an unintentional and extremely painful process (at least for me it is) and it doesn't necessarily go in the direction or at the speed that it should in order to save you. And it's so incredibly hard to exist in a state where you accept these hard truths instead of constantly trying to figure out what is right and what's wrong, what is real and what isn't, what holds value and what doesn't, etc. The mind is so hyperactive and so controlling and it's also delusional and biased by nature, disregarding truth in favor of ensuring survival